Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Conundrum of the Klal

I just took one final, had an iced coffee, the sun is shining and I feel really good right now... So while my head isn't feeling low, I think I can properly articulate some of the thoughts in my head... 


A few days ago, I was informed of the passing of a young man, after his long battle with cancer. At first, he was a name I knew by association, and by that alone, I was upset. Then I discovered the face behind the name and the hurt was so much more.
By association, this has been a rough year. The passing of a child, of a fighter in no small deal. It signifies a life cut short, when there was so much potential and so much promise. So yes, it hurts.
But then I think... does it hurt, solely because I know the children who passed? Has this year been a rough one for me because of the affiliations I have? Or has the Klal as a whole taken too many bullets... literally and figuratively. The Fogel family... the bus bombings... car accidents... cancer... Is it really all of epic proportions, or only because I know of the national and personal tragedies?
At the same time... all the pain I experience, the news that I must learn to accept (and cry over) someone else has there own portion of problems and pain to deal with...
So then perhaps it really hasn't been a "tough year" for just me.... just this family I am involved in... but... everyone?
If there were a measure, a scale, a ruler for pain, would we all be on the same mark, weighing in the same? Or does each person measure differently? The tragedies afflicting our people are great. We are the victims of media persecution, religious opposition, self hatred and assimilation. We suffer from the hands of others, the hands of our own, and from the hands of forces we cannot control. Bombings, cancer, shootings... The list is quite endless... Is this a hard year only because we are a part of _____________ and thus there are certain inherent "side effects" of being associated with such an organization?
Is it just a "hard year" for the klal? i mean, we take a hit each time we hear about a camper... but it's only those within the family.. and because it's those we know, it hurts even more... my friends who arent involved arent going through it... 
For the klal, its definitely been a tough year... but is it that much more painful because of our involvement with ________________ and the sensitivity of knowing that not every child will be healed?
Is it a "tough year" because of the profound loss we have experienced or this is normal for us...? I can't recall being so cognitive of pain and loss and suffering. Is it because I never noticed before? Or because it's so much closer to home? Or because the intensity of which we are being struck has increased?
Hearing all this bad news... all this loss... makes me feel so... helpless. It makes me more aware of a being, far greater and more powerful than I. It makes me realize, I am not in control. No one really is. Not the soldiers, the leaders, the doctors... It makes me realize I have no one to rely on during these times but Avinu She'Bashamayim... Because if I can't rely on him, then from whence shall salvation come?

Not sure how much sense this post makes, but it sorta of accentuates the fact that all of this is so incomprehensible and really, there is no explanation that man can give... at least we can try...

7 comments:

  1. I was actually thinking sort of in the opposite direction. I think ppl are just becoming insensitive to tragedies and stuff. It just seems like so many more are happening, that ppl just move on. (Then there are all the 'statistics' that the 'klal' has just grown, and there are really the same amount of tragedies taking place, just in proportion with the new size of the klal)

    ReplyDelete
  2. If that's the case... I worry for the Klal... each tragedy should have a huge impact on us...

    I never liked statistics...
    :(

    ReplyDelete
  3. Then again, I didnt mention that the Klal actually notices all the tragedy... They happen, they exist... not always do we actually take the time to internalize... Although, according to some, every headline is a message for the Jews... (tsunamis, shootings...)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Even the things that notice is taken of them, its like, how sad, he died, he was so young, baruch dayan emes, so where did u say that new ice cream shop opened up? things r unfortunately happening so often, that we no longer really take notice of them.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Very true... It becomes just another alert in our email... or update in a blog/news roll...
    we need to take the time to sit back... and notice... or else, how could all this be for naught?

    ReplyDelete
  6. When one is involved in an organization that deals with people with terminal illnesses will they will be more exposed to dealing with and hearing about death. But these day's everyone deals with death on some level. Unfortunately, there are so many stories, too many stories of people dying young.
    Every time someone passes away, it's a reminder for me. I think about my brother a"h and those memories come back, levayas, shiva, shloshim, halachos of mourning...it's not easy. But I know that I need those reminders - to get me to where I am meant to go in life.

    We need to take the reminders close to heart...so hopefully soon we will stop hearing about death and begin hearing about life, birth, techiyas hameisim, the day we are all waiting for!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Yea.... you're right...
    IY"H the day should come soon!

    ReplyDelete

Labels

2011 (1) 49 (1) 5772 (1) acceptance (1) adar (1) adult (1) age (1) aish video (1) aish.com (1) alive (1) america (1) animals (1) apology (1) art (1) attack (1) bad for shidduchim (1) balloons (1) bar yochai (1) baud hamikdash (1) beasts (1) beauty (1) beginning (1) belief (2) benefit for bentzi (1) bentzi (1) black (1) black and white (1) black friday (1) bleed (1) bless (1) blessing (1) blood (4) boil (1) bomb (1) boston (1) boy (3) boyfriend (1) boys (1) breaking glass (1) breathe (1) broken (1) Building (2) burning (1) bus (1) buses (1) camera (1) cameron duncan (1) Camp Simcha (8) camp simcha special (1) cancer (1) candy (1) carboload (1) chai lifeline (5) chaim schvarcz (1) challenges (1) chances (2) change (4) channukka (1) chanuka (1) Chanukah (2) chayeinu (1) chesed (1) child (2) children (1) chizuk (1) choice (1) choices (1) chosson (1) christmas (1) chupah (1) cinema (1) class (1) climbing mountains (1) clock (1) close (1) clouds (1) cold (1) color (1) confusion (1) connected (1) Conversation 4 (1) convert (1) count (2) cousins (1) cry (1) CT (1) cyber monday (1) dance (2) danielle (1) danielle zfat (1) dating (3) davening (2) day (1) deals (1) death (6) decision (1) decisions (4) defying gravity (1) desire (1) desires (1) destruction (1) details (1) different (2) diploma (1) direction (1) disconnect (1) donation (1) dr. seuss (1) dreams (2) driving (1) dying (1) education (1) egged (1) eight days (1) El Al (1) emotion (1) emuna (3) end (1) end of the world (1) engaged (1) Eretz Yisroel (2) explosion (1) facebook (1) facebook nation (1) fairies (1) faith (2) family (1) fear (1) feelings (2) fieldn war zone (1) fighting (1) finish line (1) fire (1) flag (3) flags (1) flight (1) fluff (1) flying (2) Fogel (1) fools (1) forest (1) forever (1) forgiveness (1) freedom (2) friend (3) friends (5) friendship (2) future (3) G-d (2) gadol (1) games (1) gashmius (1) Gatorade (1) gila rina (1) girl (2) give (1) giving (1) going away (1) gone (1) good (1) goodbye (1) google (1) graduation (1) graffiti (1) greeks (1) greeting (1) grin (1) grow (2) growing (3) growth (2) hannukah (1) hanukah (1) happiness (8) happy (2) Hashem (16) head (1) heart (8) heaven (1) hell (1) hello (1) help (2) helping (1) hide (2) holding (1) holiday (1) home (5) honey (1) hot (1) hours (1) hurt (2) hush (1) ice (1) imagination (1) indecisive (1) independence (2) infinite (1) ing (1) innocence (1) insanity (1) insomnia (1) intellect (1) introspection (1) Israel (9) israel day parade (1) israeli flag (2) itamar (2) jerusalem (2) Jewish (1) jewish action (1) jewish geography (1) jewish novels (1) jewsic passover music video (1) job (1) judaism (1) Judgment (2) kallah (1) klal yisroel (1) LA (1) lag baomer (1) language (1) learn (1) learning (1) legacy (1) lessons (3) life (17) life support (1) light (2) limbo (1) list (1) little leaf (1) lives (1) living (1) look (1) los angelos (1) loss (3) lost (1) love (6) lying (1) magic (1) Mamilla (1) Mamilla Mall (1) man (1) marathon (2) marriage (2) mask (2) masquerade (1) math (1) maybe (1) mazel tov (2) Me (2) meetings (1) meme (1) memories (1) memory (1) Mercy (1) meron (1) messages (1) miami (2) milk (1) mime (1) mind (2) miracle (1) miracles (2) mirror (1) missing (3) Mitzvos (1) mohel (1) mold (1) monkey bars (1) months (1) morality (1) morley (2) morning (1) moshiach (1) movie (1) murder (1) music (1) natural (1) nature (1) neo-chassid (1) neo-chassidus (1) neochassid (1) neochassidus (1) new (1) Newtown (1) night (1) no (1) novel (1) now (1) o (1) oil (1) omek hadavar (1) omer (1) orthodox jews (1) others (1) pace (1) pain (2) palm trees (1) passover (1) past (1) paste (1) people (1) personal (1) personality (1) pesach (2) peter pan (1) place (1) poem (1) poetic (1) poetry (1) Pop Chassid (1) popchassid (1) pot (1) prayer (2) present (1) pressure (1) pretend (2) priorities (1) prism (1) problem (1) professional (1) profile (1) psychology (1) pulse (1) purge (1) question (1) questions (3) quiet (1) quote (1) rabbi akiva (1) race (2) rashbi (1) reading (1) reality (1) recycle (1) redeem (1) redemption (3) related (1) reminders (1) repentance (1) resume (1) return (2) revelation (1) rise (1) road trip (1) roads (1) rogue (1) roller coaster (1) Rosh Hashana (1) round tuit (1) ruin (1) rules (1) run (4) running (1) rushing (1) sad (1) sadness (1) sales (1) Sandy Hook (1) schizo (1) schizophrenia (1) school (2) searching (1) seasons (1) secrets (1) sefira (2) Shabbos (5) shadchan (1) shakespeare (1) shavuos (2) sheva brachos (1) shidduch (3) shidduch crisis (1) shidduch profile (1) shidduch resume (1) shidduchim (2) shield (1) shochet (1) shooteast (1) Shooting (2) sickness (1) silence (3) simcha (1) sing (1) slavery (1) sleep (2) smile (2) smiling (3) smoke (1) sneakers (1) snow (2) soaring (1) sobiech (1) social network (1) society (1) soul (4) spark (1) speaking (2) speical (1) stain (1) staircase (1) starbucks (2) status update (1) stoppard (1) strangers (1) street (1) street art (1) strength (2) strong (1) struggle (1) stuggling (1) stupid (1) suffering (1) sukkah (1) sukkos (1) summer (1) sunglasses (1) superhero (1) survive (1) swimming (1) talk (1) teacher (2) tears (1) technology (1) teenager (1) tefilla (1) tel aviv (1) terror (1) teshuva (1) texting (1) thanks (1) thanksgiving (1) the purge (1) the purge movie (1) the purge trailer (1) thinking (2) thunder (1) tightrope (1) time (5) tired (2) top ten (1) torah (3) tragedy (1) trailer (1) travel (2) tree (1) tricks (1) truth (1) trying (2) tuesday (1) tuesday tunes (1) tunes (1) twitter (1) uncertainty (1) understanding (1) unite (1) unity (1) unspoken (1) video (1) voices (1) waiting (2) watch (1) wavin'g flags (1) waving (3) waving flags (2) wayfarers (1) wedding (4) week (1) weird (1) whatsapp (1) Who am I? (1) why (1) wicked (1) wishes (2) wonder (3) wondering (2) wonderland (1) words (2) world (1) wrist (1) wristwatch (1) writing (1) x-mas (1) xmas (1) year (2) Yerushalayim (3) yeshivishe (1) Yetzer Hara (2) yetzer tov (1) yevanim (1) Yirmiyahu (1) Yom Kippur (2) yom tov (1) yom yerushalayim (2) youtube (1) zach (1) zach sobiech (1)